Parenting is very personalized to every child and the parents. Even within the same family, the parenting style experienced by each child is different. While each parent might have a distinctive style of parenting, you would be surprised to know that the same parent exhibits a different style according to the situation being experienced. Add in the upbringing and cultural influences and what we have is hyper-personalization of parenting styles.
This article explores the unique parenting practices across the world. These diverse approaches provide valuable insights to improve our knowledge on parenting and raising happy, healthy children.
“It takes a village to raise a child.”
- African Proverb
While we all speak about the enormous support required to raise children, the Hulu tribes of Papua New Guinea, Igbo people of Nigeria, Aboriginal Australians and some other Indigenous communities in the Americas and Pacific Islands practice this in real life, even today.
The concept of community parenting is that parenting is a communal responsibility where the entire village or community raises children. This practice ensures that every child receives care, guidance, and support from multiple adults, not just their biological parents. The entire community acts as a cohesive unit, contributing to the upbringing of each child.
Advantages | Challenges |
Shared responsibility: Child rearing is a community responsibility | Clashes and conflicts: Intergenerational differences and multicultural approaches can lead to disagreements |
Collective teaching: Traditional knowledge, cultural values and practices are taught collectively. | Inconsistent messaging: Ensuring all members of a community are aligned in the messaging can be challenging |
Supportive network: Provides a robust support system for parents, especially in times of illness or hardships | Dependency issues: Parenting autonomy is compromised when individual family preferences conflict with community norms. Some parents might not develop their own individual capabilities. |
Bringing up resilient and adaptive children: As children are exposed to diverse perspectives and problem-solving approaches, they develop high levels of emotional and social intelligence. | Lack of independence and self-reliance: Children become dependent on community for support, hindering the development of individual preferences and limiting the ability to express themselves |
Community parenting fosters stronger communities and builds stronger support networks for parents. It helps a rich social environment for children to thrive and build social relationships. Balancing collective responsibility with individual autonomy for parents would make this community parenting an effective parenting model.
Community parenting exhibits characteristics of the authoritative parenting style, with a balanced approach to discipline, complemented by a nurturing and supportive environment.
“Only a fool despises a parent’s discipline.”
-Biblical Proverb
While tiger parenting is associated with East Asian cultures, the world of sports, music and business have seen their share of this authoritarian style of parenting. Andre Agassi, Williams’s sisters, Tiger Woods and to a certain extent Beyonce and Elon Musk are all products of this strict parenting.
Parents adopting this approach typically set exceedingly high expectations for their children’s academic performance and extracurricular activities. This style emphasizes obedience, rigorous discipline, and respect for authority. While some parents view it as a path to success, this style can lead to potential psychological and emotional issues.
Advantages | Challenges |
High achievement: Children excel academically and achieve high levels of success in other pursuits | Psychological stress: The high expectations lead to stress, anxiety and even depression in children |
Strong work ethic: The emphasis on hard work and perseverance prepares children for competitive environments | Lack of autonomy: The limited independence curbs their creativity and freedom to explore other interests |
Cultural preservation: It helps in maintaining family culture and traditions | Strained relationship: Parent-child relationship is strained and can lead to resentment and emotional distance |
Tiger parenting represents a complex interplay between cultural values, parental aspirations, and children's development. Understanding its nuances helps parents make informed choices that best suit their family dynamics and values in today's diverse and evolving world.
"Family is not an important thing. It's everything."
- Michael J. Fox
Reflecting the culture and spirits of Latin American countries, Brazil in particular, Samba parenting is used to describe the lively, flexible, and lenient parenting style. This has similar characteristics to Koala parenting or Panda parenting, reflecting a relaxed and accommodative nature of parenting.
Brazilian parents often integrate their children into all aspects of life, fostering a sense of belonging and confidence. The daily family schedule is often fluid and is adaptable to the needs of the children. Physical closeness and physical touch, such as hugs and kisses, is a fundamental part of parent-child interactions.
Advantages | Challenges |
Strong attachment bonds: Physical closeness forms a secure attachment bond which leads to healthy emotional and social development | Overdependence: Children may struggle to develop independence as they are under the constant protection of parents |
Enhanced emotional intelligence: Parents are highly responsive to the emotional needs of the children and provide a consistent source of comfort and protection | Parental burnout: Being always available for the children can take a toll on the parents’ well-being |
Gentle discipline: Positive reinforcement and gentle guidance are used to teach discipline instead of punitive measures | Lack of discipline: Self-regulation by children leads to lack of control in certain situations as children lack the experience and expertise to cope and parents do not enforce their opinions or discipline |
Sense of security: Children have ample freedom to explore the world and their interests, with the family support | Difficulty in coping with structured environment: With the increase in freedom, children may find it difficult to adhere to rules and cope in structured environments |
Samba parenting with high levels of independence to the child has nurtured creativity and pursuing entrepreneurship. Steven Spielberg, Bill Gates are famous personalities nurtured from permissive parenting style of their parents. While permissive parenting may promote a nurturing environment, balancing it with guidance and boundaries is crucial for the holistic development of children.
"Children are like wet cement; whatever falls on them makes an impression."
- Haim Ginott
Parents facing socio-economic pressures or personal struggles depict this parenting style. Whether it is conscious or a factor of the circumstances, the children navigate their formative years without the support of parental guidance. Invisible Parenting, similar to being unseen and unheard, is marked by a lack of guidance and emotional involvement.
Orphaned children or children facing abusive families navigate early childhood independently. Roald Dahl’s Matilda experiences invisible parenting, where her parents are neglectful and do not recognize her talents. While we associate this parenting to long-term phenomena, we could also face “Home Alone” situations where working parents do not have a choice but to leave children to fend for themselves, albeit for shorter time periods.
Advantages | Challenges |
Encourages independence: As children navigate challenges themselves, they develop high levels of independence and decision-making skills | Emotional detachment: Feelings of neglect and loneliness can lead to relationship issues and impact mental health |
Promotes self-reliance: Children develop a sense of self-reliance and responsibility from an early age | Self-Esteem issues: Feeling unnoticed and unvalued can lead to doubts on self-worth and capabilities |
Less performance pressure: Unlike other intensive parenting styles, this style creates a relaxing atmosphere with less pressure to perform academically or in extracurriculars | Behavioural problems: Leads to aggression, withdrawal and increase in likelihood of risky behaviours |
Invisible parenting is also popularly known as uninvolved parenting, is prevalent across all geographies of the world. While causes can range from uncontrollable factors like traditional gender-based roles in India, rapid urbanization in China, historical influences in Russia or work culture in Japan, the impact on children is significant. By addressing the root causes and providing resources and support to parents, we can work towards creating a more nurturing and supportive environment for children worldwide.
Exploring the diverse parenting styles around the world reveals that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to raising children. By understanding and appreciating these differences, we can learn valuable lessons and broaden our perspectives on what it means to be a parent.
At Bricks and Blocks Coaching, we specialize in providing personalized coaching to help parents build stronger, more positive relationships with their children.
Reach out to us to learn more about how our coaching services can support you on your parenting journey.
